Posted in Parenthood, Positivity, Uncategorized

How do I change the culture in my home?

This morning as my child screamed for her blanket as I drove down the driveway I wondered when she learnt to expect to get everything she wants.

Do we spoil her? Let her run loose? Why is she like this? I was experiencing deep regret. Why did I let so much slide or did I? Is this normal?

So many questions. 

It made me wonder what I have done to influence her behaviours. One thing we have been a lot of lately is being tired and grumpy.

We’ve been grouchy Mum and Dad and it doesn’t make me happy. Doing this makes her think that it is okay to act grouchy towards others.

I’m not aiming for some Fluffy detergent commercial style harmony but I’m over the grumpy.

It made me bring a comparison between my work and home life. I’m very big on a positive work culture. Respect the people around you. Make them and their contribution feel valued. Ensure they feel listened to and encourage them to grow and build independence.

Snap! 

Changing my perspective is key by the sounds of things. We all need to work together in this family to not only get everyone to bed by 7:15 each night, but to do it harmoniously and without broken blood vessels and overworked voice boxes.

One of the biggest triggers for disharmony is when she doesn’t listen. If Dan is around he will pipe up and ask her to listen to me, it all kind of goes in circles. Pointless and annoying. Then it escalates and a tantrum comes forth rapidly. Discipline drops in. Non compliance equals the stairs. Further non compliance equals the bedroom. We have a full steam kicking, screaming three-year old taken to her bedroom followed by doors being slammed then more kicking and tears.

The demands for a cuddle are at an all time high but only on her terms. We must cuddle in a particular place and without Willow. By this stage Mum is terribly exhausted.

It doesn’t seem like we are getting anywhere because the tantrums keep on happening.

This week I will be taking a few tips on board.

  1. Use humour and be light-hearted when situations get heated

  2. Recognise when you are being grumpy/tired/short/rushed

  3. Work out whether is it a fight worth fighting.

  4. Take time out

  5. Do activities together without the baby

  6. Understand she is three. Her outbursts are because she is not coping or doesn’t understand the situation.

  7. A cuddle fixes everything (most of the time)

  8. Try not to rush, try to listen and don’t dismiss

Do you have any methods of keeping a sense of calm in your home? Do you have a way to get your child to listen without getting to the tantrum stage?

Advertisements

Author:

Hi! I'm Kate, I hail from Melbourne with my three loves, Willow, Matisse and my husband Dan. I enjoy staying active, attempting to be crafty, discovering new recipes and fun things to do with my daughters. I have found that becoming a mum has tapped in to this raw positive energy that I never knew I had. In this weird new world I live in I've found that I need to look after myself more to keep myself healthy and be a positive role model for the littler ones. Keeping this in mind has kept me on track to create the best me and be a better Mum. Well it's a work in progress but we all need to aspire to something right? I am also a writer, chugging away at that elusive novel but now is the time people. I am writing and you get to hear all about it, just joking, I won't bore you with that. If you want to know where I'm at please feel free to ask it might give me a boot to get me going in my less motivated of moments. I'm passionate about women's rights, equality, children's rights and mental health. I want to say social justice as a whole but it is so broad. I believe we all have the right to be the best that we can. I look forward to getting to know you all and sharing my crazy life.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s