Posted in For the love of food, Holiday, Parenthood, This is MY YEAR

Flying The Coup

I’ve been feeling incredible anxiety and stress over leaving which seems rediculous as I know full well that they will be okay. It’s almost like a predisposition to not want to leave, to stay by their side forever, no escape. Sometimes I feel maybe I don’t want to leave a little bit too much so maybe this might be a good lesson in letting go. 

For the moment Willow and I have taken to the air for a little jaunt to Adelaide. We are gone until Sunday, it’s been 6.5 hrs since we left Melbourne and I feel lost. I’m wondering when I’ll get to Skype them. 

So it’s all a bit wah! On the flip side I had a great flight with Willow and now we can enjoy our time at Mum and Dads. 

In reflection 

This week I found myself snacking a lot more. I’ve been a bit sick and tired and desperate for energy. I bought frozen yoghurt and found the pull to eat it at night. Why do I have to eat it if it’s in the house? I say IT because it doesn’t matter what IT is I have this deep desire to put it in my mouth. Not buying chocolate and junk has been helpful but I couldn’t resist the fro yo! 

I weighed in today rather than Friday as I am away and don’t want to use different scales. Everything will be back to normal next week 🙂

Weight loss today: 800g

Weight loss so far: 5.2kg


Posted in Entertainment, For the love of food, For the love of the body, Positivity, This is MY YEAR, Too Much Fun!

Where’s my weight at?

What have I noticed this week?

Less bread

I’m eating a lot less bread. We hardly make it through a loaf normally but I noticed that there was substantially more bread left than normal. This is why we went the cheaper variety but the quality ended up spoking to us more. 

Consistent meals

I’m eating oats pretty much every morning and a tuna or egg salad. So I’m being consistent but it’s through pure laziness that it’s easier to eat the same thing. 

Quick and accessible snacks

For snacks I’ve been eating fruit, dates or nuts. EASY

Pushing the veg and salad at dinner

Dinner I’m eating whatever I want pretty much but keeping it light on pasta and high fat. If we do have pasta or something a bit on the naughty side I’m keeping an eye on the portion sizes. Everything has a salad or veg side. A soup and fish dish at least once a week. 

I made vegetarian spaghetti bolognaise the other night and found the pasta was obviously carb and calorie high. MyFitnessPal helped me to recognize that a serving half the size I would normally go for was considerably more calories than I would have thought. It’s amazing how the mind transforms when you actually think about what goes in your body. 

I’m also giving my baby better nutrition by looking after myself. I wouldn’t be surprised if my milk was a little chocolate flavored with the amount I was consuming. 

Exercise 

I did some good walking over the weekend but this week I haven’t done serious exercised at all. It’s a bit of a problem, I’ll do leg lifts and bum crunches when I am rocking Willow to sleep but I’ve been terribly slack and need to get on to a routine pronto. 

I’m living

With great intention I had plans to limit my party food intake last Saturday. I was probably more restrained than normal but can you ever really be completely healthy at a party? Finger food all day and a dessert table….. I wouldn’t let myself feel guilty for it. 

Sunday night was my big night out for ADELE!! As you can see in the photo above. It was my first night away from my 15 week old and the tickets were a ‘push’ present so I felt like I deserved a good time. I started with champagne, had a glass of wine and you can’t go without a beer at the Etihad stadium, that was more than enough for me to get the giggles. How times have changed. It was such an amazing concert, she is a brilliant artist and entertainer. 

I had a great weekend balanced out with a really healthy and nutritious week. There was no regretting any choices made and I don’t feel like I’m missing out which can lead to binges. 

 Weight loss today: 1.4

Weight loss so far: 4.4Kg

Posted in Parent Zone, Parenthood

I can’t do it anymore

Dan came through the door as I was changing a nappy covered in a puddle of tears.  I said five words I haven’t verbalised for quite some time. I CAN’T DO IT ANYMORE! 

It’s not what you think either. I’m coping with the newborn it’s the three year old who I can’t seem to work through. 

This age are notorious for having small attention spans. She stresses me out beyond belief with her inability to listen and her ability to do everything possible to be naughty. 

How is it that two seems impossible?  I had been warned about it being hectic and the first born often reacting badly to the new addition. Maybe this is her cry for attention. 

It’s gotten to the point of this continuous dialogue increasing in volume as she cheekily says NO! 

‘Matisse can you stop doing that please?

Matisse can you stop doing that please?

Matisse sit down with me’ (explain why I don’t want her to be doing what she is doing)

Continues to do whatever I don’t want her to be doing

‘MATISSE STOP!’

Then there are tears and tantrums for 30 minutes. 

Or there are the quick bursts of

STOP!STOP!STOP! And a big scream of STOP! At the end to top it off. That one happened last night as she was about to stomp on Willows head as she jumped on the bed. This is my reaction to a dangerous situation yet it is still ineffective. 

I got her in to bed and she was happy as Larry when Dan got home to give her a goodnight cuddle. I wanted to be him for that moment. 

As I unloaded on Dan it became painfully obvious my coping mechanisms were completely broken. Broke down long ago I feel. Getting to bed late and Willow waking a bit in the night wasn’t helping the situation. So I got told to go to bed. 

I had nine hours sleep! And will be going to bed early from now on. 

Now to work on my communication skills… how do I get her to listen without getting to the yelling stage? And how do I avoid the tantrums? Any advice would be appreciated because I am completely drained emotionally. I want to enjoy the time I have with her, not be telling her off all the time and have her rolling around on the ground crying. 

Often stopping and asking her for a cuddle and telling her I love her works but sometimes I need her to learn that crossing the road with out an adult is not okay. 

What are your suggestions? I’d love to hear of your experiences. 

Posted in For the love of food, For the love of the body, Personal Development, Positivity, This is MY YEAR

10 Things I’ve Done to Make Me a Loser

What a week it has been. They all seem to fly by at the moment and before I knew it I was staring down at the scales and thinking have I done enough this week. Fortunately I had done enough and to be honest I felt that even if the scales weren’t going to reflect it I was still happy with my week.

1. Added everything I ate and the exercise I did to MyFitnessPal

2. Focused on nutrition and balance

3. Exercised 

4. Documented how I am feeling

5. Let myself eat without guilt

6. Food shopped less

7. Planned my meals

8. Made healthy snacks

9. Didn’t use terms like ‘diet’or ‘cheat days’

10. Listened to my body

Week Overview:

I felt like I could have exercised more but I do plenty of incidental movement and breast feeding helps to chew up the calories. I need to balance out my meals throughout the day so that I’m not opening myself up to binge eating at night. I’m really happy with my relationship with food this week. I even went out for a lovely dinner with a friend on Saturday night and had a smaller portion of cake on Sunday. This has made me feel like I’m not missing out and I’m truly enjoying it when I eat it.

Weight loss this week: 1.3 Kg

Weight loss so far: 3 Kg

I’ll see how I go next week as my body is probably in a bit of shock but I may need to eat a bit more as I’d like to lose between .5-1Kg a week. I’ve done the quick weight loss before and found it’s not sustainable. This is MY YEAR.

 

 

Posted in For the love of food, This is MY YEAR

Overeating isn’t what it’s cracked up to be

Last night I felt stressed and tired. I’d stupidly not eaten enough during the day and I was facing an evening with the girls by myself. I’ve been very spoilt with Dan getting home to put Matisse to bed and not having that crutch along with the lack of energy  I overate. 

With Willow asleep in the carrier and Matisse screaming at me that she didn’t want green (spinach) pasta I wondered why I even bothered to cook. 

I didn’t even enjoy it. My fave food is pasta, probably one of my problems but I threw it down out of necessity not enjoyment. I felt bad for it. Hours later I realised that I forgot the pesto, now I know why I didn’t enjoy it. As I said I was tired.  

Not only did I eat my serve. I ate Matisse’s and then the leftovers after the girls went to bed. Luckily I hadn’t made too huge of an amount otherwise I could of been in big trouble. 

It didn’t end there. Willow decided tonight was the night to have a party, I’d put away the Mount Kosciuszko of laundry and I felt like I deserved a treat. Three vita wheat and some Kraft Cocoa spread later I was done. I can be honest with MyFitnessPal, my calorie intake is probably going to be over today. 

It definitely didn’t feel like a positive food day. This is a good example of when my brain switches off and I don’t get full. It’s good to see that in this time of stress I didn’t look outside of my meal and a snack. Normally I would have a cupboard full of sugar ready for the taking so I’m making positive changes in that regard. 

The overeating made me feel even more tired and a bit down.I’m looking forward to a fresh start today.  

Posted in For the love of the body, Positivity, This is MY YEAR

For The First Time 

The gurgles grew louder and louder. She doesn’t cry so much straight off just gives me a heads up. ‘Hey Mum, I’m here can you hurry up? I’m hungry’. My brain tricked me in to thinking it was the time to be waking up for the day, but no, it was more like 3 or 4am. 

For the first time since Willow was born I woke up pain free and able to roll over without strain. 

You know it’s been one of those things that I should do something about it but have instead been doing the three point roll to the edge of the bed and hobbled to the basinet. Hoping with all my fingers and toes crossed that I don’t do my back completely as I pick her up. 

Miraculously it has all cleared up and all I can put it down to is exercise. We’ve been walking to check out the ducks and doing some pilates and that simple point of movement has ironed out all of the stiffness and taken away the pain. 

I’ll be feeling like a new woman in no time. 

Posted in For the love of food

Want a healthy snack that feels a bit cheeky?

Easy as Coconut and Date Balls

3 cups shredded coconut 

2 cups pitted dates

2 Tbsp natural peanut butter (optional)

1/2 Tbsp Cocoa 

Whizz up the coconut and dates. Be careful not to burn your motor on your appliance as I have done. Do it in two batches. Add in the peanut butter. Roll in to balls. Swish around in a bowl with the cocoa. All in a jiffy. Easy as. 

Serves 30/ 

Posted in For the love of the body, Goal Setting, Just Me, Personal Development, Positivity, This is MY YEAR

Is it all in MY HEAD?

My usual routine, I look in the mirror or can’t find anything to wear. It’s time to lose weight. My reality, I would get super depressed about nothing fitting anymore and having zero energy. Dan and I usually amp up the grump factor at this stage and then I know it’s time to look at my situation.

Everyone has different trigger points but for some reason I would go and do the same thing and end up with the same result. Not reaching my goal. Over the last couple of years I have improved substantially by changing my mental attitude to weight loss. Now it’s a healthy lifestyle and I’m working on my nutrition. It sounds nicer than exercise and calorie counting doesn’t it? Nutrition became more important to us when we stopped eating meat and then again when Matisse came along. It all seemed to fall in to place and for once in my life if I wasn’t dieting my weight didn’t end up skyrocketing. That horrible cycle through my teens and 20’s I would rather forget. Add in the binge drinking along with the eating you could imagine my mental state wasn’t fabulous. I wasn’t happy. My body definitely wasn’t happy.

I want to be happy. I want to be healthy. I want to be active. I want to live a long life with my family.

Although I have had a shift in my mental attitude to a healthy lifestyle and it’s importance I haven’t been able to overcome my weight issues. It’s frustrating, why do I have to worry about all this?can’t I just be skinny? well Kate, not that many people are just skinny. They have a balanced attitude to life. I’m going to work on that balance by delving in to the psychology of losing weight.

As we were trying to conceive Willow I accessed a therapist through my doctor. You can get a few discounted sessions if you get a referral. My interest in this process was ignited after watching ‘Hack Live’ talking about ‘Body Obsession’. There was talk about something I found all too familiar Binge Eating Disorder (BED). I seemed to be ticking too many of the boxes and it was confirmed after meeting with the therapist. 

Looks like I’ll be working just as much on the inside as a I will on the out. 
 

Posted in For the love of the body, Goal Setting, Just Me, Personal Development, Positivity

Facing myself head on

There is nothing like fear. Fear of failure is something I face far too often. It creates stress and anxiety so I’ll  just drop whatever I was doing at the time and move on. Facing my fears and telling my stories is going to stop this cycle. 

Sharing my weight with you is helping me but boy is it scary. For far too long I’ve lived my life in a state of body dysmorphia. Believing I am thinner than what I actually am. Hiding from the truth. Not seeing the state of myself, of my health. Settling with what I have. I’m sick of settling. I want more out of life. So here goes….

Last week when I gave myself a good reality check my weight was 111.7Kg

Today after joining MyFitnessPal and not buying junk I weigh 

110Kg

I have felt an incredible amount of support already. Friends are offering to go on walks with me, suggesting different weight loss products. It’s all fantastic and I’m so excited to share it with you all. Even if I’m fretting on the inside. 

My first goal is a 5% loss. So I’m hoping to get there in five weeks. Hopefully it will be a Good Friday all round. Once I get to my goal I’ll share another shot with my clock 🙂

Posted in For the love of the body, Goal Setting, Just Me, Personal Development, Positivity

This is MY YEAR

I’ve been working on the mummakate blog for over a year now and this is the most challenging thing I have written. For a while there I focused more on working on a baby so the blog took a bit of a back seat. What also took a back seat was the focus on weight loss, a nice relief for someone who feels like they spend their life dieting.

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I’m not talking a few kilos I’m talking about 20. They were very well-earned and I stayed under what I did with Matisse but now it’s not as easy to focus on myself with two little ones so I need to change things up a bit.

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One of the most successful components to any of my weight losses has been people. That’s where you come in. You are going to be my people.

I’ve done all sorts of things in the past and now I’ve got two big drivers to push me forward. Another big motivator has been my Mum, she recently had some health issues which put everything in to perspective. I need to be healthy for myself and my girls.

I gave up smoking five years ago to have a longer better quality of life. Now I need to quit this weight. I’m over it.

I saw a commercial for the latest Biggest Loser show the other day, it’s called ‘Transformed’ with ‘real people’ who have ‘real stories’. I’m sure they do and they will have had amazing experiences which I value highly but what they don’t have to do is lead their ‘real lives’ while losing that initial weight in a realistic time frame.

It’s not all glamour and lights but it’s going to be exciting to get to the finish line. I’ve got a timeline of nine months to get there which takes me to Willow’s first birthday on the first of December. Each month I’m going to trial a different method of weight loss and share my experiences of it as I go along.

This month I’m using MyFitnessPal to get me on the way to my 5% goal. I’ve upgraded to the Premium version to get really serious! Tomorrow is my big reveal, I’ll be one week in so let’s see what my weight is. Fingers crossed.

Subscribe to mummakate.com and join in, help me get there. This is MY YEAR